Well here’s a question that escapes from the mouths of thousands of 20 something guys every day. Usually it’s in response to a rebuffing 40 something cougar, or so the boys were hoping, anyway. “Does age really matter,” they speak in earnest protest. Other common reasoning tactics – “I’m very mature, an old soul, I’m just generally attracted to older women, you certainly don’t look 40!” But the question really is, (should) does age really matter?
It all began with Mrs. Robinson, right? Or at least that’s when the idea of a younger guy being attracted to an older woman was brought into pop culture consciousness. It seemed to be solidified when Stiffler’s mom was declared a MILF in American Pie infamy. Now it’s the norm, and accepted. There was even a TV show titled Cougar Town. Older women started wearing it like a badge, these young studs think I’m hot! Take that soccer mom!
So what is the attraction, really? I get it, young guys and older ladies have approximately the same sex drive. There’s no drama or risk of a stage 5 clinger – most older women are not really interested in a relationship with a younger guy. They’re in it for the same reason, a hot sweaty lay. But many young guys on dating sites are approaching these women with the intention of actually getting to know them. Maybe they’ve got it figured out. As much as we like sex, we still need to be wooed. Maybe they aren’t just in it for a one-night gig, they want the world tour.
What’s crazy is that younger guys these days are often much better kissers and potentially (this author pleads the 5th) more skilled in bed than the older men who allegedly have an abundance of experience. Why is this? I’d have to give credit to the Internet. Aside from the plethora of porn and general sex talk, you can learn now to do anything on YouTube! Gone are the days of practicing on your pillow or begging for tips from an older brother. All the information is there for the taking. Maybe 40 something men should take note. Just sayin’…
Does age really matter?
I digress. We here at Profile Wingman encourage our clients (and anyone else who cares to listen) to establish and then stick with their goals. So, if your goal is to just have a fun romp in the hay, by all means, you only live once, give it a go, why not? If, on the other hand, you’re hoping for a lifelong companion, will a 20 year age difference pose some issues, now or in the future? I mean, we all had hopes for Demi and Ashton, but that didn’t work out. Now he’s with someone more age appropriate. Heidi is even jumping on the young stud bandwagon. But honestly, as much as Us magazine insists, stars really aren’t just like us.
Things to consider when asking yourself “does age really matter?” Keep in mind with any large age-gapped relationship, things will start to sag on one person before the other. And there’s the inevitable frustration when one says “Remember when Fonzie jumped the shark? That was a bad move.” Then the other responds, bewildered, saying “Who is Fonzie? And what’s so bad about jumping a shark? They do shit like that on Jackass all the time!” Cue the wa wa waaaa music.
What have we learned?
Just like when older men go for much younger women, it’s often pretty creepy. Maybe older women should stay away from the kiddie pool. It’s shallow and easy and can be fun for a while, but in the end, you realize that the adult swim is much more enjoyable. Oh, and your boyfriend just peed in the pool. Awkward.
About the Author: Nanci is a resident Wingwoman here at Profile Wingman, where we help people write their online dating profiles. Our #1 goal always is honesty. Watch our video, learn more about us, check out our services, and come back often for interesting blog posts. You can also follow us on Twitter and Facebook.