Well, the holidays are upon us once again. It never fails. Year after year we are subjected to the inevitable lights, trees, carols, portly old dudes in stinky red suits, those who have been naughty and those who have(allegedly) been nice – not to mention black Friday. Don’t even get me started with that one. But along with all of the tomfoolery comes the fun part – gift giving. Is there really anything more difficult in life than figuring out what to buy your girlfriend/wife/mistress for a holiday gift? No need to fret, your Wingman is here with the extraordinarily helpful gift giving guide that you’ll thank me for later. Cash is accepted.
OK, it may sound like I’m starting off with nagging, but it’s true. You claim to have no idea what she wants? If you listen, she will tell you. Guaranteed. But remember, we of the fairer sex are more subtle then you guys from Mars. You need to listen between the lines, “Oh my God, Mandy dragged me to the outlet mall today. It was SO COLD! So we went into this jewelry store called Borsheim’s just to warm up for a second. It was so crowded in there and some lady stepped on my foot while I was looking at these adorable dangle electric blue turquoise earrings and I think she broke my toe. What a bitch!” Did you catch that? Easy peasy.
Be a Hero
So you’ve got the listening part down. Good job. Now make her want to jump your bones. Go above and beyond. Get creative. If you can’t, then ask the salesperson, they can get creative for you. You bought the earrings, now what can you add on? A cute jewelry box? A travel jewelry pouch? See where I’m going? If she casually mentioned how cute Susie’s rain boots were, how about get her an umbrella to go with? Chicks like things that are practical AND adorable. If it’s something that she needs and is useful, might as well make it cute! You picking up what I’m laying down?
Be a Romantic
Huge brownie points for this! Shows you put forth some thought and effort. This gift giving skill also involves listening and the ever challenging long term memory. You might buy tickets to a concert of a band/comedian/sporting event which she loves. Or buy her custom stationery because she mentioned how much she loved receiving a letter from her sorority sister. Or bake a homemade carrot cake because she drools over the one in the case every time you walk by the bakery (Pinterest is a great resource for this sort of thing). Dig deep and remember everything she ever said. Something will surface, I promise. Or surprise her and learn how to knit, then knit her a hat, or learn how to play the guitar and sing her a song. You Tube – you can learn how to do anything!
How much, how soon?
This one is tough. The question is, how much do you spend, how personal can the gift be, what is the fine line between “this is perfect!” and “ohhh, wow, ummm, thanks (read – awkward)”? I always say, if you lead with your heart, you can’t go wrong. Give what makes you happy. That doesn’t mean give her the bow and arrow you’ve been eyeing at the sporting goods store for a year. It means giving her a subscription to Netflix because you love to watch movies together, or a year’s worth of Birchbox because she loves makeup or even a few months of Harry and David or Nature Box because she loves to eat healthy. Whatever puts a smile on her face – which in turn puts a smile on your face – surely there’s a gift giving idea in there to be had.
Gift Giving For Dummies
Does she like running/biking/yoga? Read the latest fitness magazine and discover what the cool kids are using these days. Clothing, headphones, shoes, water bottles, there are a million products out there. When all else fails – you can never go wrong with Lululemon. Just sayin’.
Does she love cooking and/or baking or has a kitchen and likes to eat? Get an issue of Cooks Illustrated or Bon Appetit or just go to Sur la Table and find out the latest gadget she just can’t live without. Better yet, buy a subscription to those magazines.
Any monthly subscription – wine, cheese, pickles, puzzles, condiments …you name it, there’s an “of-the-month club” out there – it’s the gift that keeps on giving! Every month she’ll be reminded of how great you are.
Ladies love to be pampered… you can never go wrong with the pedicure, massage, spa day, or even homemade coupons redeemable for foot massages, breakfast in bed, and picnics in the park.
Surprise her with something on her bucket list – a trip to Belize, skydiving lessons, a dinner at the White House. I’m sure Barack won’t mind.
If you get her pretty lingerie, pair it with a nice robe and slippers or a cashmere cardigan or something soft, just so you don’t look like a total pervert. Oh, and go somewhere new like La Perla or Agent Provocateur – try not to be so cliché.
Do you see a pattern here?
All of these gifts involve making her smile and feel good about herself – which in turn will keep you happy. A win/win! Because in the end, we all know this really is about you. The trick is making her think it’s about her. Don’t worry, I’ll keep your secret. Happy holidays!
PC Note: For those of you who belong to the “they suffered, we overcame, let’s eat!” tribe, you’d better hop to it! We’re already ankle deep in jelly donuts!
About the Author: Nanci is a resident Wingwoman here at Profile Wingman, where we help people write their online dating profiles. Our #1 goal always is honesty. Watch our video, learn more about us, check out our services, and come back often for interesting blog posts. You can also follow us on Twitter and Facebook.