So we’ve been over the first date do’s and don’ts. Hopefully you’ve already committed those to memory. I feel this topic needs some more addressing, as there are a LOT of first dates out there and a fraction of those amount into second dates. Why is this, you ask? Because you blew it, that’s why!
OK, maybe that’s a bit too harsh. Clearly there is not a love connection in every meeting, and if your prior interaction to the date was all via email and text, then you really didn’t know what you were getting into. But still, are you sure you’re doing everything right? Let’s break this down, shall we?
Rule #1 to impress a woman on the first date
Remember, whatever you do, don’t psych yourself out. No need to be nervous or think too much into it. Just be your best self. You cleanest, most well behaved, relaxed and confident self.
Yeah, that’s right, put a little effort into this date. Act like you actually give a shit. Be creative with your activity – go to a local (not chain) restaurant, a new hip bar or cozy patio that’s off the beaten path. Just don’t get crazy like planning a 20-mile bicycle ride that you realize you wish the date was over 3 miles in. Ensure that your plans can be extended or cut short with equal ease, just in case.
Bonus points: bring a small gift. A colorful flower plucked from the side of the road, a bar of chocolate, a sealed handwritten note with instructions to only open after the date – something, anything, shows you put a little thought and effort into the date and starts you off on the right, caring, and romantic foot.
Chivalry goes a long way
It’s really about the little things in life, you know? An opened door, a pulled out chair, assistance with a coat, proper ordering etiquette (this means she goes first), all go a long way and impress a woman on the first date. I assure you, these acts do not go unnoticed.
Be a man
To quote advice given before what turned out to be an epic first date – don’t be a guy, the world is full of guys. Be a man!
Anyway, I like to be a woman, hear me roar like the rest of them. But when I’m with a guy, I like him to take charge, make some decisions. Certainly consult me with those decisions, but don’t be all wishy washy. You suggest the place to go, the bottle of wine, even the appetizer.
But when it comes to the dessert, I’m in charge. Don’t forget it.
This is not an interview!
That means, don’t tell me your resume. I don’t want to hear you list all of your accomplishments, attributes and accolades! Yeah, they might be impressive, but that’s not what’s going to inspire in me a desire for an end of the date kiss, or a second date for that matter.
Want to impress a woman on the first date? Then let her speak! Have a conversation – that means a back and forth exchange of ideas, dreams, desires, likes, dislikes, passions, inspirations, experiences, thoughts about the weather and theories of relativity. Ideally it will include roaring laughter, a chemical attraction and when the first yawn finally arrives, you will wonder where the time went.
A few simple rules:
1. Make sure it’s mutually desired – it’s OK to ask if you don’t know “May I kiss you?”
2. Do prep work
a) Exfoliate and moisturize your lips. There’s nothing worse than a dry, flaky kisser.
b) Pop a breath mint
c) Check your teeth for any lingering dinner
3. Keep it slow, soft and brief, make it sensual, and keep your tongue to yourself.
Just remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day, and a relationship is made or broken on the first date. Don’t blow it. No pressure.
About the Author: Nanci is a resident Wingwoman here at Profile Wingman, where we help people write their online dating profiles. Our #1 goal always is honesty. Watch our video, learn more about us, check out our services, and come back often for interesting blog posts. You can also follow us on Twitter and Facebook.